Thursday, May 16, 2013

What we know about Abbie and the things we are learning....




It is customary for families to be given an update on their child on adoption day.  I thought I would share the information we got about Abbie:

She is from Maoming Social Welfare she was brought to the orphanage gate at 20 months with a note.  She has been in Maoming since this time for a total of almost 6 years.  At night she slept with a foster family as well as lived with them on the weekends.  In her foster family she had two brothers and a sister.  She can walk, run, jump, climb and ride a tricycle.  She doesn't know any English.  She can speak!! Personality: she wants attention.  She may be nervous in new places.  If someone she knows stays with her she will not be so nervous.  She is strong-willed.  She wants to be the boss.  She will be shy when meeting new people.  She does not like to talk to strangers and will put her head down.  She is a good eater she will tell you if food is salty or sweet.  When she stayed at the orphanage she likes to take care of the little ones.  She likes to play with them.  If she stays with strangers she will normally be shy.  She is quiet, shy, likes to smile, likes pretty dresses, likes to play outside, likes to help foster parents do house work.  She likes toys, Barbie dolls, cloth dolls, music box, building blocks, legos.
Here below is a picture of the documents the orphanage gave us - its a journal so to speak of her life while she lived in Maoming - its all in Chinese but the pictures are priceless and we will have it translated.




That was the information we were given on Monday.  Right away I knew she was strong willed and I would add - doesn't like to share.

What we have learned these past few days:

She LOVES to smile and her smile is infectious.  She has the cutest giggle and she likes to giggle as well.  She has two emotions - happy and mad and these can change in an instant.  She loves to wash her hands (she is her daddy's girl) She likes to color and is very good at it.  She is a touchy feel kind of a girl.  She and Luke will get along well.  She likes to be a mama hen - Linnea is not very fond of this.  What's hers is hers and no one else can have it much less touch it.  If she sees something she likes she is going to take it and likely hide it.  For example - David and I were missing our watches - we found one under her pillow and the other one under a stack of coloring books.  Last night after I put the girls to bed I could hear something going on in the room - went back in to find Abbie digging through David's backpack and putting what she wanted from his backpack into her backpack  She's quite a character.  If she is hungry or tired her mood changes dramatically - the combination of this would not be good news for us.  She has to eat and must have a nap.  Her mood swings are unpredictable - its hard to know if this is part of the grief process or is this part of her personality - and could it be due in part to the special need she was born with.  I don't know....

I look at Linnea and constantly remind myself of what a difference a year makes.  I am thankful for this reminder as we learn Abbie and begin to parent her.  We know this is part of God's sovereign plan and trust His timing and His plan.  The days ahead of us will be joyful and painful for all parties involved - but don't we all have good days and bad days.  I from time to time would read a blog of a fellow adoptive mama who has adopted three children and one of them being older and suffered through quite a traumatic experience - while Abbie has not suffered the same traumatic experiences - she certainly has suffered and in ways I can't imagine and in ways different from Linnea.  Being a parent of adopted children is certainly a calling and definitely requires wisdom.  I am  thankful that God promises to give us wisdom when ask for it.  Here's to the days ahead....

both girls having a moment...

one of my new favorite pictures!!


5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thank you for the update. Love the hand washing part! :) May you have great wisdom on how to fold her into your family...
Much love- K, L, M, N Hutsel

Jim Schaubroeck said...

Hi Friends,

We hope you are holding up well. We're praising God for the US Consulate being re-opened and pray your appointment can be kept.

There are a lot of similarities between Abbie and Ragan. (will discuss them later with you guys) But what a wonderful opportunity -- to watch this little soul be nurtured into a life of love, trust, sharing and caring...

We'll try to catch you one night/morning on Skype (if it's working on your side of the ocean).

andrea said...

you got this leighann. your post is raw & honest, thanks for that.
look at one year post adoption with linnea. WOW!!! amazing transformation.
praying for each of you.

mikbro said...

Many of the personality things you have mentioned about Abbie also hold true for Brennan (ownership, hunger/tiredness, etc.). I'm sure they were in the same group at Maoming, so perhaps some common learned behaviors/self preservation? I will tell you it has gotten tremendously better, but it takes time, love, and LOTS of patience. I'm so glad Abbie is with you guys, and you will remain in my thoughts and prayers!

Rebecca W. said...

Praying for y'all! can't imagine the adjustment. praying for strength and rest and wisdom. Thinking about ya'll as we have "adopted" a Chinese college student- meaning she eats dinner with us a few times a month, we take her to community activities and once she came to church with us. So very different from what you are doing, but it's a start for us.